That's My Girl

Tomorrow morning, my daughter will be bringing her lunch to school with her. I know. For most of you with children of school age, this is not an uncommon occurrence.

But for my daughter, my almost sweet 16, this is a huge deal. In her words, it's "legit." You see, the reason why she is bringing her lunch to school -- and not buying, as usual -- is because she is participating in a boycott of her school's cafeteria, vending machines, and bookstore to protest the an unfair and usurious rise in the price of food. Everything from turkey wraps to Kit Kat bars were raised 15-30 percent without warning! So now instead of paying $5.25 for six pizza dunks and a large lemonade, she is now paying $6.00.

She is not pouting or holding her breath until she is blue in the lips. She is not standing idly by with her hand out asking me and E. for more lunch money. She is protesting, and I could not be more proud of her than I am now.

Let me put it perspective. We're not talking about a great deal of money here. I know. What's another $0.75, right? But to high school kids, some of whom actually work and earn their money to buy lunch, you can bet your ass this is a big deal.

And ya know what? Her classmates did something about it, and they're still not done. This movement started shortly after prices were raised on February 15th. Her fellow students mobilized, starting a word of mouth campaign to voice their grievances. They posted fliers on the vending machines and stuffed leaflets into lockers. They even took it to the Internet and created this Facebook group. And you thought that protests went the way of the dodo bird; that the youth of today have no interest in fighting about issues that concern them.

Yeah, yeah...I know what you're going to say. "Spartacus, what's the big fucking deal?" Well besides the fact that the fact that my daughter is joining the fight, it gives me no small measure of joy to know that the youth of today are willing ton stand up and fight for issues they believe in.

Epilogue: The school announced today that prices were reduced on certain items (e.g., vending machine prices were dropped $0.25), but apparently this is not enough, so the boycott is on...and no, this revolution will not be televised!!!!

Why Cheer When You Can Play?

Nothing sets the Girl off like telling her that cheerleading is not a sport.

It's not.

We've been having this on-and-off again feud for the last few years. We'd state our thesis, offer rebuttals, then toss out the questions. I like to think that I am training a future jurist or simply teaching a young woman to stand her ground. But she's only 15 after all, and if you've ever tried debating a 15-year old, it always goes swimmingly well until something -- some statement -- causes it to end with a yell for "MOMMY!!!!!!" I'll get to why later....

Right now, I want to marvel at the fine argument The Girl has constructed for why cheerleading is a sport. Her position is anchored by the fact that cheerleaders compete. Agreed. If you've ever had the pleasure (or misfortune) of sitting through one of these events, you'll know the competition is as fierce as any sports contest; the routines are as choreographed as any Broadway show; the training and physical skill needed to compete even at the high school level is incredible. There's no doubt that cheerleaders are athletes. But cheerleading is not a sport.



My counter is that it's more like a form of competitive dance, in the way that figure skating and gymnastics are. Yes, I know that the last two examples are Olympic "competitions", but unlike a sport, in cheerleading one is judged on aesthetic qualities and not one's ability to race against a clock or juke a defender out of his or her Chucks on the way to an easy hoop. Cheerleading is not a head-to-head competition in the way that "sports" like football, basketball, and hockey are....



My friend and former co-worker Tracy said it best. She is a former Division 1A college cager (that's a basketball player) who knows a thing or two about sports. A few years ago, when I mentioned to her that the Girl was interested in cheerleading and wanted to try out for the high school squad, she shot back, "Why Cheer When You can Play?"

My sentiments exactly. In fact, it's the statement I use to inflame the Girl to the "MOMMY!" point whenever I feel I need to end the debate. Who says we can't learn something from neo-cons?

To all you Ariannas and Craigs out there, I say this: if you want cheerleading to be a sport, allow an opponent to make funny faces at you while performing your routine; allow your opponent to hit you with a tumbling body check while performing your stunts; allow the other team to hold their ears and yell "LA LA LA LA LA...I'M NOT LISTENING!!!!" while you vocalize your school spirit. Then, and only then, will I consider cheerleading a sport. Until then, shut up, lace 'em on, hit the hardwood or the turf, and play. That's what I did, and look how far it got me.